Monday was a normal day and I went to Hip Hop after I finished training that evening. Had a great hour of cardio and got to bed by 10:00. When the alarm rang at 5:10 I was a little startled but knew it was coming. Being the dedicated person I am, I hit snooze and began negotiating with myself while half asleep.
No one on Earth will know or care if you don’t do this.
It is cold out. And dark. Reset the alarm for 7:00.
Whose idea was this! I should drive to Gloria’s house and bang pots and pans in her driveway.
I just finished working out nine hours ago. No need to do it again.
This challenge wasn’t meant for me, it was meant for everyone else.
Then a little whisper started, quietly at first then building up until it overtook the other train of thought:
You will feel so good about yourself.
You are a conqueror and a warrior.
Every choice matters because you matter.
There is nothing more important than this choice, right now.
I know you don’t feel like it. That’s OK. Do it anyway.
So I swung my legs off the side of the bed and stumbled to the closet. I decided to put on my workout clothes before doing anything else. That, for me, is half the battle. Once the workout pants were on, I was starting to feel like I was going to make it.
Then a little coffee, a little granola and off I went.
In the car on the way, I felt this wave of relief come over me. I was so close to blowing this off. I would have been so disappointed in myself if I had. Instead, I had a real sense of accomplishment, and I hadn’t even arrived at the workout yet. I really do understand that the victory is in getting there.
Two days later, 5:10 AM and the alarm is ringing again. Bloody hell! I look at the alarm clock and seriously consider every excuse I know. I don’t feel good. My elbow hurts. My back hurts. I’m tired. I don’t feel like working out. It’s dark. It’s cold. It’s raining. My car’s been stolen by gypsies. Not really, but I was hoping so then I could go back to bed!
But you know what? I slung my legs over the side of the bed again and did it. Friends, a part of me was not on board for this at all. It was screaming and fighting and kicking pretty violently. But only until I decided that I was going to do it anyway. Then it shut up, for the most part.
The most powerful thing you have is your ability to choose. When you decide to do it anyway, you override the part of you that doesn’t understand the human heart. When you decide to do it anyway, you access the part of you that can do anything. You become a warrior, a fighter, someone who doesn’t give up or give in. When you become that, you get to use that part of you in all areas of your life. It’s the best gift ever. To be filled with confidence and courage for the day, just because you decided to override the excuses and make an empowered choice.
To me, fitness has never been about looking a certain way or weight a certain number. I found out a while back that fitness can be a way of accessing my warrior self. The fighter. The person who never gives up or gives in to that old, worn out lie that my choices don’t matter. They do. They do. They do.